Internal Family Systems and Parts Work
Jessica Chang, MHC-LP
It is part of colloquial language to describe the experience of “internal conflict” or to distinguish between a part of oneself which wants one thing while a separate part of oneself wants another. Internal Family Systems (IFS) takes this a step further and questions which parts of you are in conflict and why does each part want what it wants? And instead of identifying a good part and a bad part, or an angelic side and a devilish side, or a unified self with sick, damaged, shameful rogue parts which need to be fixed, IFS “conceives of every human being as a system of protective and wounded inner parts led by a core Self” (IFS Institute).
So what is Internal Family Systems Therapy?
Internal Family Systems is a non-pathologizing, evidence-based practice developed by Dr. Richard Schwartz, who began his career as a systemic family therapist and an academic. In working with individual clients, Schwartz found that people consist of various parts, or sub-personalities, which people often recognize and reference within themselves. By tuning into the relationships amongst parts within individuals, he recognized that these relationships are organized in similar patterns to those he saw within the families he counseled. By the IFS Model, a person is an ecosystem of relatively discrete minds. Each part is designed with specific qualities to play a valuable role within each person and has the best of intentions in carrying out this role. However, life experiences force these parts out of their roles, reorganizing the system in unhealthy ways. Thus, inner parts become wounded and protective.
When these parts feel safe and seen, Schwartz found that his clients experienced the emergence of one’s core Self, characterized by the 8 C’s: confidence, calm, compassion, courage, creativity, clarity, curiosity, and connectedness. IFS operates with the belief that this confident, compassionate, whole person is at the core of every individual, and one’s core Self knows how to heal and cannot be damaged. Accessing and healing the protective and wounded inner parts of oneself and freeing them from their forced roles is the goal of IFS. This is done through helping one access their Self, and through that Self, creating inner and outer connection and understanding and healing their parts.
So what are “parts”?
Parts make up the multiple sub-personalities, or families, within a person’s mental system. Wounded parts are often associated with painful emotions like anger and shame, which leads to their protective role of keeping one’s self from experiencing the painful feelings of these parts.
Parts often play 3 common roles:
Exiles - hold hurt, shame, fear, and other difficult emotions from early experiences. Exiles are the youngest, most vulnerable parts of a person, one’s “inner child”. They have often experienced trauma, and the burden of holding these emotions keeps this inner child frozen in time. Exiles may begin as joyful and playful parts, but they are often highly sensitive and prone to being hurt.
Managers - aim to keep exiles hidden and contained separate from conscious awareness in order to avoid distress and pain. Managers take on the protective role of controlling people’s surroundings and managing emotions and tasks to continue navigating daily life. It is the voice people most often hear, looking out for one’s day-to-day safety and proactively protecting one from feeling any pain or rejection. Managers are attentive to following rules and keeping up appearances to align with what is considered socially acceptable. This can appear as perfectionism, people-pleasing, care-taking, overthinking, and self-criticism.
Firefighters - activated when exiles produce overwhelming, painful, or threatening emotions that get past managers. The goal of firefighters is to inhibit these emotions by any means necessary. Firefighters are similarly protective of the most vulnerable parts of oneself, but they tend to be reactive and informed by pain which leads to a different approach than managers. Firefighters may show protective action through alcohol and drug use, binging, cutting, or lashing out at other people.
Sub-personalities are often in conflict with each other and with one’s core Self. For example, managers and firefighters especially tend to be at odds. Part of oneself may want meaningful connection while another part of oneself fears rejection and wants to hold back. This conflict, called polarization, creates feelings of stuckness, overwhelm, and being torn in different directions.
IFS focuses on re-harmonizing parts that are in conflict with one another and empowering the Self to lead in all parts of life. When someone is able to access and operate through their Self, their parts may be liberated from the extreme roles they have been forced into, and trust in one’s Self can be restored. Much like within families or groups of people and their parts, by acknowledging and caring for one’s inner parts, a sense of belonging and connection is fostered. This is important in fostering an environment in which one’s inner parts realize they do not have to be completely alone or solely responsible for taking care of oneself. Being in communication with various parts of oneself comes with varying levels of difficulty, but with patience and tenderness, parts can eventually take on healthier roles. Inner critics can become cheerleaders or a source of safe advisory, exhausted caretakers can help set boundaries, and rageful parts can help discern what or who is safe.
So what does IFS Therapy look like?
IFS Therapy involves working with a therapist to help identify and understand the parts within oneself. By acknowledging difficult emotions and caring for wounded parts with the 8 C’s of one’s Self, one’s parts are released from being trapped in extreme roles. Underlying problems may be addressed and healthy conflict management can be learned. Therapists may utilize various techniques to help clients identify and connect with their parts such as relaxation exercises, visualization, journaling, and documenting relationships between various parts of oneself and their core Self. IFS Therapy can be useful in working with families, couples, and individuals experiencing various mental health conditions (e.g. depression, anxiety, phobias, panic, physical health conditions, trauma, substance use, general functioning and wellbeing, etc.).
Sources:
1. Internal Family Systems Therapy. Psychology Today.
2. Newberry, L. (2023). Unpack Internal Family Systems, a nonpathologizing approach to therapy. Los Angeles Times.
3. What is Internal Family Systems? IFS Institute.