Stress Management, Holiday Edition.
By Jessica Chang, MHC-LP
In 2023, a survey from American Psychological Association (APA) showed 89% of US adults feel stressed during the holiday season, with 41% indicating higher levels of stress in comparison to other times of the year. According to a survey conducted by National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI), 64% of individuals living with a mental health illness felt that their conditions worsened around the holidays. These feelings of stress can lead to physical illness, anxiety, depression, and substance misuse (McLean Hospital). It is important to continue to learn how to manage your mental health during this particular time of the year.
Stress management
Feelings of personal stress can go unnoticed as one navigates the holiday season, although most likely it continues to have an impact on one’s health and those nearby with the chance of a major, uncontrollably stressed-out moment in the presence of an intentional or unintentional audience. Recognizing and tending to feelings of stress early on and working on long-term stress management in the “off-season” can help keep you and your feelings of stress in a more comfortable and safe place. This may look like…
Before Holiday Events:
Check in with yourself. Be honest and realistic. How are you feeling about this time of year and possibly seeing or having to interact with certain people? Are you missing anyone during this holiday season? What is this time of year bringing up for you? Understanding yourself and where you are at may provide insight into what you need at this time and with whom/how you would like to communicate these needs. It is okay to ask for help and extra support!
Get organized. Create a schedule and familiarize yourself with your current capacity. Know your boundaries and set realistic expectations for yourself and others. Mentally preparing for a marathon of events and social spaces can help you pace yourself and protect unnecessary expenditure of precious energy at this time.
Make a healthy stress-management plan. Anticipate your triggers and know what and/or who would be helpful in stressful times. Come up with a list of responses in anticipation of unwanted conversation. Familiarize yourself with breathing exercises and relaxation techniques. Having a list of healthy coping strategies to pull from before stressful events can relieve pressure from yourself when you are in an activated state.
Practice setting boundaries and saying no. Help yourself avoid being in spaces you do not want or have the capacity to be in at this time. Doing so early on can allow you to not have to do so in the midst of an already stressful time, and it is also good practice for when you may want to enforce your boundaries in the moment.
Prepare your mind and body. Be kind to yourself and practice gratitude. Accept your limitations and be patient with others and their limitations. Charge your mind and body with sunlight, sleep, exercise, and vitamin-rich nutrients. Winter is hard - show yourself care.
During Holiday Events:
Check in with yourself, regularly. Again, be honest and realistic. Think about the list you made of healthy methods to destress. Call your friend, lean on community, listen to music, go outside, meditate, dance to your favorite song, etc. Be selective and intentional in conversations you have with others. You are only able to control your own actions. When it comes to tuning into and addressing your stress levels, do not wait until your last morsel of calm is about to leave your body!
Embrace You-time or immerse in community, or both. The holiday season can feel extremely lonely. Consider embracing the activities and tasks you have been wanting to do for some time. Learn something new; do something comfortable; reacquaint yourself with your interests. You could also consider looking towards community. Volunteer, attend club-meetups, turn towards centers of culture and religion, embrace support that may have been offered to you by friends and new acquaintances.
Celebrate loved ones. If you are missing someone during this time, it is okay to grieve and it is okay to be joyful. Grief and joy are not mutually exclusive. Bring loved ones who could not be around for the holidays into the space by talking about them, talking to them, reminiscing, sharing memories, and telling stories. Embrace those who are present. You are allowed and it is natural for humans to have multifaceted feelings.
Be open to change. Whether you associate the holidays with primarily happy times or horrible times, it could be useful to be open to change. This may involve letting go of the fantasy you have been holding onto. Every year, not just you but everyone around you also gets another year older. You may have learned to love or resent the consistency of your family’s dynamics in the past, but you may be surprised. Realistic expectations are important, but being open to change may help to manage feelings of disappointment or create avenues for more fulfilling relationships in the future.
Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
Post-holidays and off-season long-term practices
Keep track of new insights and understandings.
Practice mindfulness and gratitude.
Process your feelings.
Continue to learn more about yourself and others.
Gain empathy and understanding.
Think about forgiveness and where you want to go moving forward.
Go to therapy.
Happy holidays everyone :)
Sources:
Howard, S. (2023). 7 tips for managing your mental health during the holidays.
Maintaining Mental Health During the Holiday Season. NAMI California.
McLean’s Guide to Managing Mental Health Around the Holidays. McLean Hospital Mass General Brigham. (2024).
Supporting Your Mental Health During the Holiday Season. SAMHSA. (2023).